NRI Men often live in a myth that marrying Indian women is probably the better choice instead of marrying a local from their country of residence. There is nothing wrong in choosing a life partner that you desire, yet one needs to be aware of every legal right a woman holds as per matrimonial laws in India.
Another common mistake we come across by several NRI Men is that they don’t give enough time to their relationship before marriage, neither they make any effort to find out little more about the person they will be tying the legal knot with.
Our Managing Editor, Arnaz Hathiram, spoke to one such NRI husband who is based out of United Kingdom (UK), got married in 2018, how he was trapped and now spending lakhs of rupees funding the lawyers to bail him out of the mess.
Robin Perreira (Name Changed) is an Overseas Citizenship of India (OCI) Card holder based out of UK. Robin who works for a bank there, was on a lookout for marrying an Indian bride and thus got himself registered on shaadi.com in June 2018. Priya D’souza’s (Name Changed) mother uploaded her daughter’s profile on the same matrimonial portal where Robin got acquainted with the mother.
Initial questions by the lady were generic such nature of Robin’s work, his family details, what kind of spouse he was looking for etc. After a few chats, the mother shared Priya’s number and the two started talking. The couple spoke and chatted for nearly two months, where Priya crafted an emotional story how she belonged to a separated family and was living with her father in Safdurjung, Delhi.
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Priya told him that her mother wanted to marry her off because of social stigma, but she too wasn’t averse because she want to get a good family life with a settled husband. The woman also spoke about her father, who was a retired man from a bank, and how they did not have much money to run their home. She even went to the extent of saying that her father’s pension was not enough for them to survive as most of it would get used up for rent, food, etc. The girl herself wasn’t working either despite being a graduate.
After three months of long distance communication, Robin and Priya decided to get married. Robin had informed the girl, that he would come down to India in September 2018, get married at a church and then go back to process her visa application from the UK. He had also informed her that it was not possible for any of his family members to attend the marriage in India due as his parents being old and sister had recently delivered a baby.
Priya had got Robin involved so emotionally within 2-3 months, that she made him agree to spend every single penny towards the marriage. Robin quotes,
Learning about her family’s financial condition, I offered to spend entirely on our marriage. I sent her Rs 6 Lakhs for starting the preparations in Delhi.
Not just this, I also bought her home appliances such as new refrigerator, television, microwave, others — all booked and purchased by me online from UK. I have each receipt for the same.
The two got married in September 2018 at a church in Delhi, stayed at a hotel for a few days and as agreed Robin flew back to the UK. Priya was clearly aware that Robin would be returning later in January to take her along.
Husband Is The Sole Provider
I told her it is not my responsibility to buy you a house and car in Delhi. To this she replied that if I did not fulfil her wishes, she would not give any respect to my parents. She told me that now I was her husband and it was my duty entirely to take care of my wife.
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My mother did not want me to marry that boy because he was from a different religion and was addicted to drugs.
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When I insisted, she started getting violent and started calling me mad. She also complained to my sister, who politely asked her to manage because it was our personal affair.
My sister asked her how can you demand a house and money for your father? When Priya became more abusive, my sister blocked her number on whatsapp.
Cat Is Out Of The Bag
I was shocked to learn that this wasn’t the first time she had threatened a man with legal complaint. Her friends told me Priya was a serial complainant against men.
She would settle the matter with money with these Men and later get her FIR quashed in High Court.
Police, Women Cell Vs Husband
Why did your mother not accompany you?
Priya came with a list of receipts showing expenditure towards marriage by her. Not just this, she also claimed how she and her family spent Rs 65 Lakhs on our marriage.Despite these allegations, she has not filed a single receipt in court till date.
You have to live with her. It is not our problem, you had to think before marriage.
My lawyers kept scaring me that police can come to UK anytime and arrest me. Later, I found out that this was not true as I was an OCI Card holder.They kept asking money from me suggesting how they had to make payments to police further and till date made me cough up Rs 30 Lakhs in total, whereas my case is still at stage 1.I was not even informed about the FIR until I was served notice in December 2019.