Amidst the outrage following the ghastly Nirbhaya rape case in 2013, the proposal of making sexual offences gender neutral was indefinitely postponed. Over the years, there have been several debates for and against the inclusion of Male gender, equally as a victim of the offence. Below are some of the arguments that are vocal against making sexual crimes gender neutral.
A new bill to make rape laws gender-neutral is introduced in India. Women misused the law? Will not men misuse the law? How many men get raped by women?The truth is,women don’t rape men.Women & transgenders get sexually abused.Don’t need to make laws to protect heterosexual men.
— taslima nasreen (@taslimanasreen) July 14, 2019
Tell me which law has not been misused.We know all laws r misused.But if a few women misuse any law, do u really need to give an opportunity to privileged predator group to misuse it? Women get punished if they misuse.Rape is not gender-neutral.Rape law shdn’t be gender-neutral.
— taslima nasreen (@taslimanasreen) July 14, 2019
While the above is just an example demonstrating absolute backlash even on the utterance of Gender Neutral laws, one such case of sexual harassment by a woman has gone viral on social media.
A boy named Rounak Chaki has poured out his heart on Facebook narrating his mental and physical trauma, as a last resort for getting help. He has accused one Tanushree Mohile through his post and alleged rape, sexual exploitation, physical assault and mental harassment by her. Rounak quotes:
I couldn’t even get proper professional help here because of the prevalent mentality in the society that does not see assaulting men as a crime. A counselor literally told me I shouldn’t have made a big deal out of it and just enjoyed it. My consent and repeated NOs were ignored.
I was abused on a daily basis for months until I was raped. When I was sick and scared of her I was raped. I was forced without my consent.
Adding further, Chaki says that he just wants to crawl out of his skin and not live. He repents that he has lost his dignity, his autonomy and his choices. He exclaims that it took him nearly five months to come out with this to his family.
I don’t even have the option of filing a rape case thanks to our current laws..
Raunak had tagged several Men’s Rights Activists calling out for mental and legal help and here’s how some of them have responded.
Rounak Chaki has shared his story of rape, physical & mental harassment by his girlfriend Tanushree Mohile. He says he kept taking the abuse thinking things will get better but it only worsened. He’s looking for legal help though he knows Indian laws don’t treat men as victims. pic.twitter.com/MGhiWoa8UA
— Deepika Bhardwaj (@DeepikaBhardwaj) July 22, 2019
He claims he has been beaten up, locked, abused repeatedly. While he was the one being abused in the relationship, his girlfriend lied that he was the abuser. This is common behavior of violent female perpetrators. They pretend to be abused while being the abuser themselves pic.twitter.com/UDYTjWwdde
— Deepika Bhardwaj (@DeepikaBhardwaj) July 22, 2019
ALSO READ –
Last week, senior lawyer and Parliamentarian KTS Tulsi introduced a private members’ bill before the Rajya Sabha to introduce amendments in the criminal laws to make sexual offences gender neutral. He would be sending the bill to several members of Parliament as it was a “social issue and not a political issue”. Tulsi said”
Law needs to be balanced. The balance has been disturbed. All sexual offences should be gender neutral. Men, women, and other genders can be perpetrators and also victims of these offences. Men, women and others need to be protected.
The bill proposes amendments in the Indian Penal Code (IPC), the Criminal procedure Code and the Indian Evidence Act to ensure that the words “any man” and “any woman” in the sections relating to sexual offences in the laws are changed to read as “any person”. This would extend the protection of the law to women, men and transgender persons.
PILs for making sexual offences Gender Neutral have been rejected twice by SC, putting the onus back onto Parliament:
- February 2018 : The Supreme Court dismissed a PIL demanding crimes such as rape, sexual harassment, outraging modesty, stalking, and voyeurism to be made gender neutral, saying it was Parliament to amend the law.
- November 2018: The Supreme Court refused to entertain a plea challenging the Constitutional validity of of Section 375 of Indian Penal Code (IPC) which deals with rape on the ground that the provision is not gender-neutral.
Full Text By Raunak Chaki
“Help. I am in hell. I have to come out with the truth because I am still being harassed. I don’t want to. And this affects my mental health even worse but I have no other avenue. I tried to hold it in for as long as possible fearing for my safety and the fact that the truth about the prostitution and shared nudes may come out and ruin her reputation. But since she has continued to lie outright to protect herself and been nothing less than an absolute hypocrite trying to win brownie points by posing as an ally, I have to finally speak out.
Tanushree Mohile raped me. She physically abused me for months. And when time came for her to try to be better than her actions, she ran to US and refused to acknowledge her actions. I have proof of most of the things I am saying here. And I have the marks and hospital visits to show for the physical abuse.
I am sorry for doing this. But I have no avenue for any form of right after everything that happened. I couldn’t even get proper professional help here because of the prevalent mentality in the society that does not see assaulting men as a crime. A counselor literally told me I shouldn’t have made a big deal out of it and just enjoyed it. My consent and repeated NOs were ignored. I was constantly afraid of being hit. And scared I had to give in. The most I will do is raise my voice when I am hurt.
I was held basically in captivity for months. She lied about everything so I wouldn’t leave her. When I started to realize that she was lying about everyday things and creating unnecessary complications, I confronted her. It led to a huge argument, lasted two days. And at the end of it she got me drunk. I have never had a sip of alcohol in my life. You know this, every one of you. I was so upset that day I actually texted a few of my friends whether it was okay for me to drink. I just didn’t know that I was drinking neat whiskey. She got me drunk and once I blacked out, cut my face. My therapist literally thinks she might have put something in my drink. She always has sleeping pills or melatonin on her. She accused me of trying to hit her and made me and everyone in my life believe that I hit her or tried to. If you read through the screenshots you will see she says she doesn’t even remember what happened that night.
I woke up to a neighbor picking me up and taking me to a hospital. Once I was sober, I was told that I had apparently threatened her when I was drunk. So she called the cops. I apparently pinned her or hit her or strangled her or something. The story changes every time. At which point scared that I may go to jail I apparently cut my own face. That’s the reason we were given. And that’s the story I lived with. Living the past months as someone who did that. Atoning for it. Trying to be better.
It wasn’t until a few days ago when her mother shouted at the other end of the phone while she tried to lie again about me burning her things (Never happened-her things are lying at the house) and all that she finally told the truth.
She cut me. Because she knew things were getting to a point where I would have left. She didn’t want me to go and so created a situation knowing I would take responsibility for all that happens and she wouldn’t have to deal with it.
That’s how I was lied to, made to feel like a criminal while I got seven stitches on my face. And scars that’ll never go. Just so she didn’t lose me.
She lied here too to everyone in her life. Made a huge deal that I hit her or something. We were back living together in three days. The incident happened on 23rd of December and by 27th of December we were living together again. I had to keep quiet in front of her while she protected herself by lying to everyone that she was living alone and all. She abused me throughout the move and didn’t stop since. She lied to family and friends that I was gone somewhere and getting treatment and whatnot. I wasn’t allowed to get out of her sight..
I, thinking then that it was my mistake tried to do the right thing. Stood by her and her abusive ways to do whatever I could for what I thought was my fault. I was caged to a city I didn’t know and moved, completely isolated, without family and friends. I was abused on a daily basis for months. Until I was raped. When I was sick and scared of her. I was raped. I was forced without my consent.
She lied to me constantly to make sure I wouldn’t leave. I will not enumerate these things here as she can be arrested on the basis of these lies in NJ right now. Imagine being forced to live with someone who refuses to let you live your life but is a fugitive on the run.
I have tried my level best to contain all of these lies. To make sure that none of this goes out. Tried to do the right thing and stand by her because to me that is what I meant when I got into this relationship. I made the choice to be in it and tried my best to make it right. And try to fix things within the confines of that relationship. She was disillusioned that she would be sexually harassed anywhere she goes to work so I gave up my registered company to her and she used that too. She took up control and she didn’t know what to do or anything. So I then taught her the entire business and now based off of my company, clients are being poached and work given off elsewhere in her name.
In spite of that, all I have gotten are more lies and threats. The promise of jail if I ever tell anyone the truth.
raped me and ran to a different country and threatened me after I tried to beg her to do the right thing. Even if I can forgive her, I have to live my life constantly with all this. There lied my fault. I tried for days to try to beg this person to stay. Let me try and fix what she had done and let me find a way to try. All I got was threats. That I was harassing her.. That me begging for her to do the right thing after everything she did, put my mental, physical, emotional and financial wellbeing to crap that I deserved this. I begged initially as I thought this was her way to breakup. It wasnt until she finally told me she cut me, that i realised what had happened over the past months was deliberate.
I want to crawl out of my skin and not live. I can’t after everything. I was held back with lies and false promises. And I have lost my dignity, my autonomy and my choices.
No one should be able to commit these heinous crimes and run to a life of lies again.
She raped me and ran. Then told me I should just have gotten over it by now when I tried to get help.
In spite of that, all I have gotten are more lies and threats. The promise of jail if i ever tell anyone the truth. The only thing I did wrong? Since she tried to run last month, I have texted and called hundreds of times to no avail. I was being threatened of family contacts and friends with money who can do me physical harm. Of political connections that can go after my family.
Up until now my family knew that I was going through something. It took me five months to tell them what I have been going through…And now they have to face the issues that come with me going public about being raped and abused for months. And they will now have to be subjected to the hell that comes with this..Being a man doesn’t make it any easier..I don’t even have the option of filing a rape case thanks to our current laws..
Please stop letting her get away with everything. Please get her help. I am begging you to stop this vicious cycle. My life feels ruined. The trauma I am in won’t go. Because I have to live with the physical as well as mental repercussions of what Tanushree has done.
Over the past few weeks she has since tried to suppress the truth and used threatening means to harass me. I have text conversations going back three-four months where she has accepted what she did. But tried to refrain from it since and created elaborate lies to maintain her lifestyle. She broke my laptop. Sold off my camera. Forced me into over a lakh in debt and now is trying to fleece money out of my mother. Money that she owes me, I refuse to ask of her. But money that she now claims I owe her. She literally texted her about the same. This is how far this woman has gone.
All of you on whose name Tanushree has continually harassed me. You all deserve the blame. You all deserve responsibility. This person did what they did and then used your sympathies to victimize me. Constantly created a situation where she knew I would finally succumb to my depression and suicidal tendencies and kill myself. Giving her a clean break. All of you let that happen. All of you made that happen. If tomorrow I can’t take this anymore. It’s still all your fault. It is your fault Aman, Alfirio, Unnati, Neil, Shashaank, Gunit, Kate, the Saxena brothers, whatever political connection the Mohile family has. It is all of your faults. She literally threatened my life and the lives of people close to me with your names. You supported this woman who kept abusing me and you let her use your names and money and network to do so. You helped her do these heinous things.
Please stop her. Please. Someone please hold her accountable.
I have tried over the past five months to try and fix things. To take the time and forget or forgive. I spent the better part of the past month trying to right her wrongs. On my own. While she found ways to blame me for things that never happened. Said she was being nice to me so never said those things to my face before. It’s a bit rich to hear that from someone who raped you and ran to a different country before cutting ties.
And all I have gotten is nothing. This person has shown no remorse, hasn’t asked me for forgiveness once although I have apologised a thousand times for being hurt by her. I didn’t wish to go public. I didn’t wish for any of this to get out. So the most I did was tell the honest truth to her mother. That was spun as a fabrication. I have tried over and over to get this woman to do something. Something right. And all I got was nothing. So I am here. Begging in public. For some semblance of something. Please ..
If any one can help with the resources it takes to get justice out of this in a court of law please do. I have lived ashamed and felt I deserved this. I did not.”