If a man courts a woman for a few months and backs out for any reason, say compatibility or anything else, the woman can walk up to a police station and file a case on him citing rape on pretext of marriage. However, when girls/women date boys or men for several years, get engaged and later back out due to better opportunities with other prospects, men have no recourse. Of course, no one can be compelled to marry anyone, but it is only the men who are jailed if they happened to do so.
Here’s a story of a young bright man, preparing for UPSC, who was allegedly compelled to end life due to an abusive and manipulative relationship.
The matter is currently in court, and without passing judgements ourselves, we wish to narrate his side of the story, as expressed by his brother.
In 2008, Jitender Sodhi (Jeet) enrolled with the Kurkshetra University in Haryana for his Graduation degree, where he got acquainted with his fellow classmate, Seema (name changed as matter is subjudice). Both of them fell in love and continued with their relationship for next six-years.
In the year 2014, Jeet started his service with a Public Sector Bank at Bengaluru, while he was simultaneously preparing for his civil service exams.
Later, both families agreed to solemnise the marriage and preparations parallely commenced. Jeet and Seema were officially engaged in the year 2015 with the blessings from both side relatives. However, suddenly the girl’s family broke the engagement without reasons.
The family says they learnt about Seema completing her PhD and thus she had changed her mind to marry someone who would have a senior government job. Since Jeet had just begun his career, the girl backed out of the marriage.
Jeet Moves On
Jeet was totally disheartened and could not absorb this shock, therefore, in order to divert his attention, he started focussing on his job at Bengaluru. He was posted there as an Assistant Manager with a public sector bank. He once again channelised his attention in preparation for UPSC.
As fate would have it, Seema learnt about Jeet’s aspirations and she once again decided to return into his life. She re-initiated telephonic conversations with him and succeeded in her efforts of enticing the boy again. Seema, who was now based in Jaipur, would pressure him to visit her in Delhi everytime and with her nefarious plan, she got himself transferred from Bengaluru to the capital within the same bank.
Jeet Returns To Delhi
After getting transferred to Delhi, Jeet hired a room in a PG in old Rajinder Nagar to prepare for his UPSC examination while juggling with his job. Intermittently, he started visiting Jaipur in order to meet with Seema whenever she called him.
There were times when Jeet would station himself at Jaipur for almost 15-20 days at a stretch. He later realised that his frequent visits had taken a toll on his UPSC preparation and thus retorted to Seema that it was getting difficult for him to balance the two.
To this, Seema allegedly taunted Jeet,
You are a worthless person and you are burden on the earth. No girl would ever fall in love with you. You should commit suicide instead of living such worthless life.
Jeet Was Allegedly Driven To Suicide
Jeet was a very emotional person and Seema was playing a game of hide & seek with him for the last nine years. The family alleges that she humiliated him to the extent of driving him to end his life. She made him constantly feel that he was a burden on earth who could never be a successful person. She taunted him that no girl would ever fall in love with him.
At the age of 28, Jeet could not bear the endless pain and died of suicide on June 6, 2018. He hanged himself at his PG in Delhi, but left behind a detailed suicide note and a pen drive which narrated his ordeal. Jeet clearly blamed Seema, who compelled him to take this extreme step.
In the suicide letter, the boy categorically said that he had done well in the preliminary examinations of the UPSC and would have definitely got selected in the exams.
As stated by Jeet’s brother, initially the police refused to register the FIR, however, when the father approached Hon’ble Court using his remedies u/s 156(3) Cr. P.C., the police registered the FIR under instructions from the court.
The family alleges that the investigation thus far has not at all been satisfactory and there could be a possibility of delaying the matter to clear up evidences.
Jeet’s brother also shares that they suspected someone unlocking the deceased’s mobile and getting into his whatsapp chats, even while the phone was in police custody. Also the pen drive which was recovered from Jeet’s dead body, which had three audio recordings, they were not sent to FSL (Forensic Science Laboratory). As per the family, the police did not mention details of the other two recordings in their status report.
Jeet’s brother also shares that the investigating officer was also unable to gather Seema’s detailed chats from her mobile and email ID.
Seema gave written statement to the police confessing that she was aware of Jeet ending his life on June 5, 2018 (a day prior). Brother of deceased quotes,
This means she abetted my brother’s suicide and deliberately concealed this fact from everyone except her family members. If she had any basic intentions to save my brother’s life, she could have intimated my family.
However, she chose to visit the police station in Jaipur on June 6, 2018 and filed a complaint against Jeet instead after she got a confirmation of my brother dying.
The entire family of the accused possibly planned a conspiracy cunningly against Jeet for abetting his suicide.
Incidentally, Jeet left some photographs of him with Seema in intimate positions, which were clicked by the girl and without the knowledge of the boy. It is unclear whether Seema was using those photographs and blackmailing Jeet as she never planned to marry him. The chats left by the boy show how she only made false promises of marriage, but had no inclination to do so.
IIT Fellowship To Accused Girl
One of the IIT’s has provided Seema with a fellowship, despite her being charged on an FIR u/s 306 IPC (abetment to suicide). Jeet’s brother exclaims,
If the case would have been vice versa and the girl had died of suicide, no one would have employed or granted scholarship to the boy.
More than two years have passed and Delhi police has not submitted the chargesheet till date. Family awaits justice…
Since the above video is a mix of Hindi and English, we have translated the same below in primary language for our readers:
I’m taking this extreme step to end my life because I was forced to do so. I was tortured mentally for the last 4-5 years. The reason behind my suicide is only that I’ve been in a relationship for the past 10 years. I’ve loved that girl, named XXX, immensely. Even she said she loved me. We were about to get married in 2015, however, because of some family disputes, our marriage could not take place.
The girl had the tendency to leave me any time of my life. Suddenly she would come back and tell me that she loves me and patch up, and later again would break up. This was the regular process of our relationship. I was used to it, however, it again started after the marriage was broken off, just after 2-3 days, she said to me that she doesn’t have any concern with me. Not only that, but she also said that she doesn’t have any feelings for me.
Back then, I was in great pain, I was in Bangalore, alone. I was very depressed, and somehow I managed. I
didn’t take any wrong step, and started preparing and studying for my career.
Jeet recalled that he didn’t talk with the girl for an entire year after the incident. She had called him a couple of times in between the year, however, he didn’t receive them. In February 2017, I was studying when I got a video call on hangout, and it was from her. I was shocked, at the same time, happy. I answered the call, and as we both were able to see each other, we were very happy.
I had my Civil service exam, still, I talked to her. It was when I wasn’t in contact with anybody, neither was on any social media platforms, and I was only concentrating on my studies for that entire year, and in that very time, I received only her call.
I was hustled that year, studying for the Civil service exam and also working at the same time. I would go for work and used to study after coming back home. I also would go to coaching classes on weekends and had worked so hard in that very year. However, even after being so strict with discipline, I would always answer her calls to respect the feeling we had for each other. Back then she called me continuously for 7-8 days and we used to see each other on late-night video calls.
XXX showed the urge to meet me and I went all the way to Delhi, just to meet her. We both were happy to be back together and she started crying saying, I feel comfortable only with you, and I want to marry you.
I was very happy. I assured her that we’ll talk to our parents and sort things out. I only asked her to wait until June as I had my exam I was preparing so hard for. Once, I’ll be done with my exam, we’ll go to our parents to convince them about us getting married. However, I also asked her not to change in these two months, as
she had the tendency to change her feelings and statements in just a few days and months. She agreed to it, and we kept our relationship going.
She spoke abruptly with me stating that nothing could happen between them asking me to “get lost” as she doesn’t have “any feelings for me”. This repetitive incident made me more depressed, and the hard work that I had put into studying was ruined because of her.
Even after all this, I didn’t tell any of my losses to her. She started ignoring me. It was my birthday month, August, when she called me, and again things commenced between us. She had completed her Ph.D. till then and was posted in Jaipur. She used to live alone in a rented flat on the outskirts of the city. We mutually decided to meet. And we were for the first time in our relationship lived together. I used to visit her place and live there with her. That was the time when she again told me that she loves me. More than 20-25 days we had spent together under one roof, and things turned into a physical relationship. I thought, now things have changed and we’ll definitely get married.
But, just after one week, she told me she doesn’t have anything for me. This time, I was broken. I have done so many things for her and sacrificed my life, my career, my social life, my friends for her. I was very serious about her, everyone who knows me, definitely knows that about me.
I don’t know why she used to break my heart over and over again. When I contacted her after 2-3 months, she told me that she was “just killing time”, asking me to “get lost” again.
When I told her my life will be ruined, she just said let it ruin, your chapter has been over now and disconnected the call.
She also asked me to keep our live-in relationship of a brief time a secret from others, however, I was heartbroken to know that she herself had told the same to her friends after asking me not to. When asked about the reason behind doing all these, she said that “it was all an agreement” and besides, she just wanted to kill time.
I invested ten years of my life in that relationship. Her family thinks of me as some kind of stalker, but I didn’t tell anything to her parents, considering she’s a girl and has to have respect.
I questioned the system that the society has adopted, wherein, a girl can blame anybody without any proof, while a guy has to have shreds of evidence that he has been tortured, mentally, physically, or he’s on a verge to end his life because of any woman, but still, people wouldn’t pay attention to them.
I’d been responsible for the very first day of our relationship. I had moulded my career for her by opting to work in a bank and started preparing for the Civil service exam to get a stable lifestyle.
Before taking this extreme step, I had appeared for my exam and was confident that I’d pass. From the past five years, I’m in deep trouble, I’m not able to sleep. I wake up at 4 in the morning and get an extreme headache. I couldn’t take the back and forth and cheating relationship anymore.
Even after sending several messages, she’s not even talking to me. Everybody, including her parents, sister, thinks that I’m some kind of cheap guy who’s stalking her, while nobody knows the reality.
The last 20-25 days were the hardest for me. Perhaps, she’s still cheating on me. The only reason to commit suicide is XXX, she had used me, cheated on me, and made fun of my feelings. Daily, I’m dying. I cannot hurt her, so I’m hurting myself to get relief from this pain. I’m ending my life.
Suicide Prevention Contact Details:
Men in distress due to family problems and threats of false cases can contact either of the NGOs listed here: Men Welfare Trust, MyNation Hope Foundation, Save Indian Family Foundation, Vaastav Foundation